


This hunger is not my own

by Undomiel21



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Age Difference, Canon-Typical Violence, Character Death, F/M, Forced Marriage, Friends to Lovers, Hate to Love, Multi, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-11
Updated: 2019-06-19
Packaged: 2019-11-18 14:49:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18122468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Undomiel21/pseuds/Undomiel21
Summary: Nan is the first daughter of Lord Eddard Stark and after the events that left her fatherless and captive in the hands of the Lannisters she is forcibly married to Tyrion Lannister. Will she find solace in her enemys arms or will she let herself be consumed by her hatred?"Your Gods are not my gods,Your king is not my kingAnd I am not your wife"A re-writing since the very beginning of the whole story of a song of Ice and Fire skiping some events, adding some and changing the timeline as it suit the story





	1. Wolves night orchestra

**Author's Note:**

> No beta reading, sorry for the grammatical errors and all the other errors.  
> Be nice is my first work. I just needed to give Tyrion some love  
> All comments are welcome  
> Enjoy¡
> 
> I will be adding little quotes from the books and tv show. the parts I really like. So.. obviously not everything will be mine.

The night Catelyn Stark gave birth for the second time she tough for sure she was dying, this time without doubt she was dying. Her first born Robb hadn't been easy either, but how could this pain last so long? Pain in her bones and cold in her skin... too cold a night to properly breath.

She was sweating and it only made it worse, temperature had been getting worse constantly through the past week. Summer snows coming more and more often and the room usually warm for the heated walls of Winterfell could not relieve her from the chills she was getting.

Near the fire and surrounded by furs, the others didn’t seem to mind the weather, perhaps she was too tired. “One last push my lady” she heard the voice of the maester. And she pushed so hard she passed out. After all morning and afternoon in labor her first girl was finally in her cradle, clean and bundled in a warm cloth, but quiet... was it the silence that woke her up? she couldn’t had been out for more than a minute. Or so she hopped because Ned was standing there when she opened her eyes again. And it was a grim terrifying sight with his face tight and his shoulders slumped. she shivered.

 

Eddard Stark had been waiting outside with a worried guarded expression. Eyebrows furrowed and arms crossed as he stood guard outside his own chambers. His sons were there too but sleep had took them both. Someone had come to take them to bed hours ago but they’d returned and hided beneath a long chair nearby, whispering quietly as if their father could not see them clear as day and falled asleep in the floor again.

Eddard let them. They were too, awaiting for their new sibling. He could wake them when maester Luwin opened the doors, hopefully soon. It had been too long and every minute he worried more. One late night would do them no harm, he tough and wrapped them with his own cape. Fur covered them and they moved closer to each other like cubs.

When maester Luwin finally opened the door his expression told lord Stark his worries were not unfounded. He entered the room and without delay the midwife assisting with the birth put a baby in his arms.

“she is too weak my lord, we tough she was… she is breathing but won't last the night.” maester Luwin informed him, and he was right. His daughter looked pale and dead, nothing like her brother had been, a rosy bundle whimpering softly in his cradle, or any other newborn he had seen before.

Tears gathered in his eyes “Ned” his wife called and he froze his tears before they falled, she would need him now. He took the baby to the bed and put her in Catelyn’s outstretched arms, maester Luwin was explaining the situation to her. But he could not hear, sadness was a numbing cold in his ears, in his mind.

He looked at Catelyn, sweat on her face, ragged hair and so exhausted… the tired happiness that should be on her face, making her look beautiful and mighty like the first time with robb, nowhere to be seen.

He looked then at his newborn, so still, so quiet, and kissed his daughter forehead. It was cold to the touch like a corpse... but she scrunched her little mouth, the first movement he'd seen her made, then it opened and a strong wailing started.

The baby cried and suddenly the night was full of voices, inhuman ones. The howling was terrible and loud, impossibly near, so near it was as if wolves were inside the castle. At the strong noise the midwife, went pale and gasped walking herself into a corner as far from Catelyn and the baby as she could.

Maester Luwin, always calm, put himself together after a first startled sound and went to aid the mother to feed her child but looked around while walking, as if the walls could tell him the reason of this strange phenomenon.

“Ned the wolves, why are they here Ned? make them go away” a chill ran visibly through her, afraid for her baby. Lord Eddard didn’t move “it's all right Cat they are outside”. And it was a beautifull sound the choir that steered his daughter much needed cry. As suddenly as it began the howling stopped and there was only a baby crying. Catelyn was exhausted and shocked, she try to feed her daughter but she was loud and didn't appear to be willing to feed. Maester Luwin took her and her wailing decreased a little, he was trying to take her pulse.

“it seems my lord that your daughter is stronger than it appeared, her heart is steady. She may yet survive”.  
Eddard had always loved the sound of the howling pack. It was calling home _gathering the family_ he tough as his children little heads appeared at the door looking for their new sister.

__________________

Her daughters were as different as they could get, she though. Sansa the proper lady always polite and quick to please and with all her own Tully countenance. Nadja was polite too, but she didn't care to please and she was not exactly a proper lady.

Not that Catelyn was lax in her education, not at all. As the oldest Stark girl she needed to be educated in all the arts of a true highborne for when she’d marry, and she was. Just like Sansa she knew all the proper words and greetings and bows, they knew how to administer a household and at least a bit of poetry or music or flower arrangement or really anything worthy her daughters may be interested, had been introduced.

But she didn't speak platitudes as often as Sansa, did not danced as often as Sansa, and the administration of a household was much less interesting to her than the books in healing of maester Luwin, she would do embroidery for five minutes before seeking the library, and she would rather hunt and ride with her brothers than dance and sing with her sister.

Catelyn could abide the riding and even had brought her a winter hawk in hopes she would do so in a more proper manner than with a bow but she had let the animal out of the cage the second day and had never returned.

Her main problem though, was a mind too inquisitive that would often ask improper questions and speak too freely. Fortunately the one thing that Nadja had from her (if the only one for her looks were completely Stark) was the sense of practicality. She knew it was easier to get time at the library after finishing her duties than be banned from entering if the septa found out.

Catelyn wasn't too worried about her, she was not willful or irresponsible only a bit odd for a lady but in the north that may still found a good home. Her real concern was her Arya, so unruly and wild and unwilling to put on a facade for the benefit or civility. Too honest with herself and all the others.

But as she sees Arya run away from Bran after hitting the mark instead of him at her brothers training, mocking him in front of everyone, proving herself as good a marksman as her brother and Nadja run toward the oldest two all laughing together, she thinks that this two daughters are northern girls in and out, Direwolves of Winterfell and her southern manners maybe would never suit them as they do Sansa.

She hopes a good northern lord would be accepting of their wild and odd side. And if not… well they were the daughters of Lord Eddard Stark warden of the north. Marriage would not save the man that mistreated the shewolves of winterfell.

But she hopes for a happy life for her children. Catelyn knows about the bear island of the Mormonts, were women are warriors. And although one day she may have tough about it as scandalous and uncivilized, looking at Arya she is glad now that her child was born a Stark. In these strange lands they all may scold her for her mischieves, but no one will mistreat her for being just what she is, Arya Underfoot.

She is glad, but will not tell that to Arya, she knows she will never win this battle with her daughter and truly, she does not wish to. But Catelyn still will try to put into her head all the good manners she can manage.

She glance beneath, and Nadja is taking Jon snow away from her gaze, she was always her brothers girl, since that first night when the wolves responded to her crying and the noise only stopped after her brothers were carrying her in their little arms. Catelyn always feared that one day the pack would take her baby.

____________________


	2. Curious Pup

“Can I go too dad?” Was asking Nadja as they ready the horses  
“that's not a sight for a lady Nan, stay with your sisters” she frowned but didn't reply, and Ned was tempted to ask for someone to watch her.

Nan was not sweet and obedient like his Sansa but she would often choose to bargain and plead with him rather than outright disobedience unless she was not interested enough in which case she would let it go. But there were also those rare occasions on which she would become stubborn and if she saw no hope in convincing her father she would stop her pleading and quietly do as she pleased. 

Lord Eddard was always at a lost as to which was the case. Her bright eyes were twinkling gray and blue but was it mischief or supplication he could not tell. Fortunately his sons were not confused at all.

“she will follow us” informed Robb when they were passing the gates  
“without a doubt” confirmed Jon  
.  
He let out a sight and asked Jory to watch the rear for Nan. “yes my lord” said Jory amused. 

And he did stopped Nadja on her tracks when they reached the location. Keeping her on her mount far enough that she couldn’t see anything. 

She sulked a little and waited for it to be over.  
“I know how it looks like already” she complained  
“then you should have no need to be here Nan” replied Jory  
“it's not the same thing looking in the drawings than looking at the real thing”  
“you shouldn't even be looking at drawings. Didn't your lady mother forbid it?”  
“is not like I can unseen them now” she said “and maester Luwin said that they are important knowledge for saving peoples lives”  
“Knowledge that a lady don’t need. The healing arts are good and all but you should stick to teas and ointments like lady Stark said.”  
“I’m learning that too..” she whined  
“why do you even need to learn about a head anyway? a wound there and you are done for most times”  
“neck wounds”

Jory finally let go of her rains when it was done and she approached her father and Bran. Her father gave her a stern look and she noticed for the first time the grim cast of his eyes and kept her mouth close. she choose not to approach the head after all.  
.  
On the way back she told her brothers she had seen a dead deer.  
“you really should stop talking about corpses Nan, or you’ll never get married” Said Rob mockingly.  
“No, no, this one was weird, gutted but not eaten why would someone kill a deed and not eat it?”  
That picked their interest. she told them were and they ride ahead losing themselves in the white, greens and blues of the forest. She stayed back, refraining herself from the race, her little brother’s pony could not keep up and she listened while her father talked to Bran  
.  
“do you understand why I did it?”  
“he was a wilding” said Bran “they carry off women and sell them to the Others” their Lord father smiled  
“old Nan has been telling you stories again” he looked at his Nadja then  
“he was a brother from the Watch” she tried “was he not? all black clothes” her father nodded  
“no man is more dangerous than an oathbreaker, but you both mistake me. The question wasn’t why the man had to die but why I must do it”  
“King Robert has a headsman” said Bran voicing their confusion.  
“He does, as did the Targaryen, yet our way is the older way we hold to the belief that the man who passes the sentence should swing the sword, if you would take a man's life you own it to him to look into his eyes and hear his final words. And if you cannot do that, then perhaps the man does not deserve to die.” the siblings went quiet savoring the words.

From all his children Eddard knew that this two were the clever ones. Not that the others weren’t smart but none like Bran and Nan would learn a lesson and use it at their convenience. Bran would be an outstanding Lord one day, wise and fair for he was born with a gentle disposition. And he could only hope his Nan would marry someone willing to listen to a woman's advice.

Many years back she had asked him about her future marriage, it was after the harvest feast. And she had approached with childish concern on her face.

“Dad can I choose who to marry?” Eddard answered cautiously, he would try not to lie even to her eight year old child  
“within reason, you will have a say. I will not force you into a marriage with someone you don’t like, but you must marry into a noble house Nan” she mulled this over a few long seconds and finally gave in.  
“alright, but I want it to be a northern house” Eddard smiled at this  
“you want to marry a northman? why not a southerner?” she scrunched her nose  
“they are so dedicated dad! I hear it at the party, they have such strange manners and don’t seem valiant at all like in the songs”  
“your mother is from the south”  
“I know but mom doesnt’ count. Lady mormont said my mom was as tough as any northerner.” she announced proudly “and then she was telling me about her cousin that married a lord from highgarden and how they would not let her wear any armour or practice fencing or hunting without a bird and its so hot she can’t stand outside a shade without her skin burning red and she is miserable” Ned was laughing by the end of her speech and she was outraged  
“dad! i'm serious!”  
“yes, yes I know. Promise me to find an honorable, loyal man and you can marry however you want to marry Nan” She beamed at him and kissed his cheek before running. Later that day Sansa and Arya where running at him demanding the same conditions that Nadja. He gave his word knowing what an extraordinary bad idea that was. But then again and honorable man was a rare sight to find.

 

Nadja would soon be a woman, and no talk about marriage had been brought again but for that weird afternoon in the godswood when she was nine. That day she told him she wanted to marry Jojen but Jojen said it wasn't possible. At first Lord Eddard had tough Jojen was one of the kids she used to play with but that wasn’t a name he had hear in winterfell before. 

“who is Jojen Nan?”  
“Jojen Reed of course, he is nice and from a noble family like you wanted, but he said we couldn't because he would die too young. But he is not sick anymore. Why would he said that father?” 

Lord Eddard didn’t know how to respond to that, Howland Reed heir was indeed a child about Nadja’s age and his name could very well be Jojen Reed but there had been no communication with his old friend since the news of his birth was delivered, and he never talked about him. 

“when did he said that Nan?”  
“last night” Nadja had been feverish the last three nights without reason and sleeping almost all day long until this morning that she appeared completely recovered, probably all this talk was her daughters fever dreams. But Eddard Stark knew his daughter and the little odd things she sometimes knew, so he wrote a letter to his old friend asking for his health and that of his family and the replay a week later informed his son Jojen had been gravely ill for many days but was now recovering his health. 

Nadja was now thirteen and no more talk of Jojen had happened but the memory still made him uneasy. To often his daughter appeared to know thing she shouldn’t. 

He watched her race her horse to meet his brothers ahead. Few minutes later they were all following Jon after he called out waving and shouting for the others to come and see what they found.

Robb and Nan where standing in the snow cradling something in their arms, Robb was knee deep but Nan had always been short for her age and it almost reached her waist, despite that she seemed delighted. 

Bran reached them on foot, almost the same height as his sister. All of them stopped the march, standing near the rotting corpse of a direwolf. 

Nadja put one of the cubs on Bran arms who passed from shocked at the size of the dead mother, to delighted at the soft and small pup. Nan scurried a bit further gathering the rest of the litter while the others examined the corpse and then there was Theon demanding that they kill them. “No” she snarled at him and her brothers stood together demanding Theon to back off and pleading to Father to allow them to keep them.

It seemed hopeless until John renounced his right to a pup just like he had no right to the name Stark. The bastard brother Nan loved so much. Her father finally gave up with the condition that they would be responsible for them in all. Live or die it would be by their care. 

They were already moving when Jon pulled away and Nan followed suit. “can you hear it?” he asked, she shook her head but dismounted, her black pup carefully fastened at her chest with her coat, and walked away “Nan?” she was back smiling with a white furred red eyed cub. “this one is yours” she said to John.

 

__________________

The arrival of the king was a noisy business, everybody had something to arrange before they were there. The queen and her family should be arriving too, Sansa was all about it, and Arya was excited too she wanted to see all the knights, Nadja was a bit annoyed by the relentless coming and going so she hide herself in the godswood or the library. 

Of course she was also curious of the visitors, the king was a friend of his father, a great warrior they said, the queen was rumored to be a great beauty and her brothers stirred all kinds of rumors from the servants. 

She listened and then asked about it. Her mother reprimanded her for saying scandalous things about her future guests, she asked her father only one question since he did not like gossip, and then she tried maester Luwin who was her main source of answers 

“why do everybody call him the imp?, is it true that the king is as good as warrior as father? why do the southerners have so many knights? there is no difference with our swordsmans is it? is Ser Jaime a better sword than the king? is it true that the Lannister are the richest family in the seven kingdoms? does the crown own that money because is the crown or is it because the queen is a Lannister? where exactly was casterly Rock again? how long is the journey? how long will they stay? will Ser Barristan be coming? how old is he?” 

Maester Luwin answered as he always did. Nan loved him, the patient old man, willing to share with her his books and his words. And often scolding her about one thing or the other, but even then there was a tender warm in his words. 

He teached all the Stark children but it was only Nadja that took something like extra lessons. Her mother was not amused about the subjects they studied so maester Luwin tried to control the flow of her curiosity to practical and more suited for a lady things, music, poetry, flower arrangement. She liked almost all of it and it worked if only for a very little amount of time before they were getting lost in the lessons naturally following the subjects of her interest.  
Lady Stark never asked directly to stop, and so he chose to continue. It may be a little morbid for a highborn lady to pass her hours looking at pictures of body parts, and reading heavy volumes on the uses of herbs and concoctions, her interest for the healing arts however, amused her father most of the time, and she had his leave to learn.

________

When they finally arrived everyone was excited and nervous and smiling at the sight of the southerners, it looked like the north suddenly had a wider range of colors.

the King was the first to greet them and paused for a second at the sight of Nadja. Eddard knew exactly what he saw. The living memory of his lost love. he knew just how much like his late sister she was, a ghost walked winterfell. But after years of looking at her he could spot the difference better than the similarities, Nadja was not his sister. 

She was much shorter her skin was white as milk not the darker tone of Lyanna, And her eyes were large and profound and of striking pale color, gray and blue depending on the light. Her hair was also much darker, raven dark. She had, nonetheless, her nose and chin and cheekbones, her delicate hands, and all the Stark bones.

He took the king to the crypt and there he told him what he already suspected. The king was here as they feared, to take him south, Lord Eddard was not happy, could he reject it? was Robert still the brother he remembered? The second offer however prompted him to speak. “I have a son. You have a daughter. My Joff and your Nadja shall join our houses.” “Nadja may not be the best choice for the task? she loathes the idea of marriage. She is just a child and she may change in time her opinion in that regard but she may not. Her sister Sansa is much better suited to be a wife.”  
“Doesn’t matter, sure, whatever as long as is yours"   
__________


	3. Dirty paws and curious minds

John watched his family enter the banquet with their royal guests, first the queen with his father and lady catelyn with the king, and then his half brothers and sisters. Nadja came first with Rikkon in a silver gown that made her eyes look like burnished steel. She smiled at him when his baby brother spotted him in the bench with the young squires.

Robb was scorting Mircela and Sansa the crown prince, the tall boy had a bored, arrogant look on his face. The queens brothers came last, a tall handsome man and a short ugly one. they were both hard not to look at in very different ways. 

He drank a lot with the squires for a good while of the banquet until his uncle Benjen of the night’s watch came to sit with him, checking on him most likely. He asked about his pup, ghost, that was eating and entire chicken at his feet. 

He was probably one or two beers too far to mind his words much and at the first mention of the Watch he asked to go with to take the black. Benjen of course said he was too young but John, undeterred was babbling about Daeron Targaryen when Nan showed up  
“Daeron Targaryen was only fourteen when he conquered Dorne” he was saying, a compelling prove that age does not matter, and Nan appeared from nowhere snickering in his ear  
“Dorne was never really conquered. Daeron victory only lasted a summer and he lost a bunch of men, he wasn’t very smart” Said his know-it-all sister, his uncle was smiling warmly  
“Your sister is right, Also Daeron Targaryen was only eighteen when he died or have you forgotten that part?”  
“I forget nothing” he answered boldly and a wicked smile appeared on his sisters face before asking mockingly  
“are you drunk?” he ignored her  
“I want to serve in the Night’s Watch uncle” The discussion grew hotly from that when his uncle refuse again.  
“came to me again when you fathered some bastards of your own” and that was it for Jon  
“I will never father a bastard. Never!” he spat and the he realised how silent the table had grew. He excused himself and when out.

He ran with Ghost at his heels and didn’t realised that Nan had followed him until Whisper trotted over pass him and he looked back. His sister was frowning in that very soft way she had, if annoyed or worried he could never tell. She opened her tensed lips to say something when a voice interrupted her

“boy is that animal a wolf?” Nan then approached and made a curtsey to the Imp, the queen’s younger brother. 

“Direwolves my lord” She answered politely. Their emotions forgotten for a moment as the strange little man talked without formality about how vomiting in a feast was bad manners so he decided to leave. 

He wasn’t rude exactly, only a bit foulmouthed for speaking to a Lady, then again Nadja was too small for be regarded as anything but a child and he was after all the Queen’s brother. He seemed courteous enough to Nadja as he spoke and brother and sister were equally intrigued by him. 

“My lady, might I have a closer look at your wolves?” he jumped from the height he had being standing and their pups retreated. he laughed then “I believed I frightened your wolves. My apologies” Nan laughed too  
“They are just pups now, they will grow bigger than a pony” 

“They are not scared” said Jon instead and called Ghost so Tyrion Lannister could approach, the wolf bare his teeth but Jon ordered him to stay still so the Lannister could touch his white fur. Whisper was not so timid, she sniffed at him for a second before sitting at Nan’s feet, her curiosity satisfied, and made no move when Tyrion peted her, glancing at him with bored eyes. 

He finally looked at Jon and the talk that followed was not appreciated. That could happen speaking so blatantly about being a bastard. Definitely not polite, but not untrue either Nadja just listened, it was probably good advice. Jon was maybe too drunk or too young to understand, but they both were a bit stunned watching him walk away 

“He seems nice” said Nan 

____________  
Tyrion entered the godswood feeling more like an intruder than he ever felt in his whole life, even by daylight it was dark, the trees too close and tall for the sunlight to pass, the earthy smell cold in his nose, but he walked in, he wanted to see its heart. 

The feeling of being an overstepping outsider growing with each step. He finally catch the sight of red against green of the heart tree, the pale weirwood gigantic even in the distance, its roots growing above ground, keeping the rest of the trees at a distance. 

He kept walking to see its face until he noticed a black spot of fur between the roots of the tree, as if feeling his stare the wolf looked up straight to him and bared his teeth. 

“hello, there” he said uncertain hoping that the wolf would be as uninterested in him as it had bein last night

“hello Lord Tyrion” said a voice from above. Perched in the branches of the heart tree right above her wolf was little Nadja with a book in her hands as comfortable as she would been in a chair, smiling warmly at him. 

She went down the tree one handed clutching her book, her bare feet making a soft sound when she easily landed, and straightening herself to appear as ladylike as possible after her display. She made a small graceful courtesy saving her dignity.

Tyrion noded back “lady Nadja good you are here I would rather not be maimed so early in the morning” he said looking at Whisper that was now quietly resting but with her eyes still on him 

“oh I don’t believe she would… they follow us everywhere anyway” she said after a small pause like she really didn’t know

“safer that way for everyone. won’t you catch a cold going barefoot?” she looked a little shy, the slightest of flush coloring her cheeks and she bite her lips together 

“I won’t but I might catch a scolding”

“well your lady mother doesn’t have to know then” She smiled brightly.

Tyrion often found children harder to deal with than adults, still too blunt on their curiosity and many got scared with his looks, but once in a while was the type of child that still cared very little about looks and had not learned yet to despise the ugly.

Nadja Stark appeared to be one of those, she smiled with warm and it was a rare sight for him. He peeked at the title of her book 

“Songs and Tales of Old” he read “I’m afraid Im not familiar with this work”

“Do you like old stories? but you wouldn't be familiar with this one, maester Luwin said is very rare” and her smiled only got wider as she spoke “probably there are only about four known copies of it but they may be another at the wall we don’t know, our library has a lot of this rare books about the history of the north and the arrival of the andals, this one is just songs thought” She said convincingly shattering the quiet girl image that Tyrion had made of her the night of the feast 

“I make a point to know a little bit of everything, but I must admit I find old stories very entertaining. I have not yet visit your library but I do intend to. As you see I am admiring your castle very thoroughly” he said signaling the godswood with and ample gesture of his hand “how old are these trees anyway? I don’t believe I ever seen a bigger godswood” Which was a bit obvious since Tyrion didn’t travel noth frequently. 

“Well, legend has it that this godswood is more than ten thousand years old, Brandon the Builder built the castle around the grove. Have you seen the hot springs? we have a lot of ponds from the streams. They run through the castle walls and keep it warm even in winter, This one is cold though, obviously” she said pointing the freezing pool beside the weirdwood “Is it true that there are no weirdwoods south from the neck?” 

Tyrion found himself feeling better with her casual chatter even if the sinister red face of the tree still made him uncomfortable. This was her home and she acted like it was acceptable for him to be there 

“I saw one of your ponds on my way here it looked quite cozy but I don’t think I’d fancy to get out of scalding water in this cold weather, and no is not completely true. The Andals did cut down most of them but a few of the oldest houses still have their godswood with weirdwoods at the heart, the blackwaters in the riverlands for example still prefer the Old Gods rather than the faith of the seven. The Red Keep however does not have a weirdwood in its godswood and is the case for most of the noble houses of the south” 

She followed his gaze to the red face and moved aside to let him approach at the tree Tyrion did not touch it but stared at it “This is the biggest one I ever seen” he said softly 

“Uncle Benjen said that north of the wall they are everywhere and much bigger than this.” she continued watching him curiously “Is said that one can not lie in the face of a heart tree” 

“Better get out of its face then” said Tyrion and she escorted him out of the place chatting with the familiarity and confidence of a child or a highborne he tough. He wasn’t sure if she accompanied him out of courtesy or if she was on her way back but he was a bit grateful for it. He felt much more at ease with a Stark and a direwolf at his side. 

He had the opportunity to talk with Nan many times in his stay at winterfell for them both passed much of their time in the library, one of the warmest places of the castle. She also knew the placement of most of the books better than the young septon of winterfell and helped him enthusiastically. 

He would find her there at late hours, probably pass her bedtime, and she always welcomed him with a simile before resuming her reading, or chattering with him about the book. Many about plants properties and the healing arts. Tyrion didn’t mind the chatter or the infinite stream of questions. The little girl was smart and if he needed quiet he could just go to his own chambers.

The first night he went up the stairs to find her fast sleep with her head in a book, it was surely way past her bedtime and Tyrion walked to her intending to wake her up but he couldn't take a step closer. The ever present black wolf baring her teeth, he tried calling out her name but apparently she was a heavy sleeper.

“Well now, Whisper I'm sure you don't want your master catching a cold in here, so why don’t you let me pass..” He talked to the wolf but apparently it was as bad idea as he had assume because she standed and showed her teeth again when he dare to take a second step.

Fortunately Jon appeared behind him with his Ghost “My lord” he looked at him suspiciously 

“Good I was trying to figure out how to wake your sister without losing a finger” 

“I wouldn’t recommend you to try it My lord” he said walking up to Nadja. Whisper had calmed down at his presence and made no move to stop him from shaking her shoulder, she grunted and opened a pair of unfocussed pale eyes 

“come on” he said obviously use to this task “your neck will hurt if you stay here” she let herself be carried putting her arms around Jon’s neck, almost as sleep as they had found her and Tyrion tried not to laugh when she looked at him and tried to curtsy from within her brother’s arms before closing her eyes again. 

She was also at the library when Bran fell. It was a curious event, Tyrion was sitting himself in a comfy chair near Nan, she had been reading and stopped in the middle of turning a page lifting her head alarmed, Whisper mirroring her movements like they had heard something he didn’t.

And then the howling of a wolf teared the silence and Whisper answered the call. Inside the walls of the library Tyrion felt a chill running through his back at the sound, loud and oddly sad. Nan didn’t said a word and left in a hurry no time for her usual smile. 

He felt little for the boy he knew just by sight, but he did spare a tough for the child that wasn’t chattering anymore, or reading with a smile on her face or humming in the tree branches, and now just glumly passed by.


	4. Soft growls and Sharp swords

The road to King's Landing was wonderful, the Stark sisters were so exited with the novelty of it all. Arya with the new people and Nan with the new flowers and herbs. It took their minds from Bran.

Sansa was especially excited that morning, they had an appointment with princess Myrcella and the Queen to ride in the wheelhouse. She looked beautiful in her blue silks that contrasted just right with her auburn hair.

Nan had not yet dressed for the occasion, she was wearing a simple gown of earthy tones in comfortable wool. She looked at her sisters arguing about the event, finally seeing no much option than to join since they were distinctively failing at reaching any kind of agreement.

“I know it's boring but is just a day Arya. We have to be in good terms with the Kings family now that Father is hand of the king” she tried to reason

“why? we are not hand of the king”

“why would you want to ride a horse and get all sore and sweaty when you could recline on feather pillows and eat cakes with the queen?” argued Sansa unhelpfully.

“I don’t like the queen”

“Well me neither and I'm still going” Said Nadja and Sansa was growing more scandalized by the second but Nan really did not like the Queen or her twin brother. They were too arrogant, just like the obnoxious little prince.

They lost the battle with Arya and Nan hoped it didn’t matter that much, Arya had enough tasks she hated already and it would only get worse at the Red Keep so she sighted and walked Sansa back to the inn envious of her little sister.

“I want to ride too” she said ruefully

“How could you say that”

“How could _you_ say that. Of course we prefer riding, riding a horse is fun and thrilling and horses are great, and just because the Queen is rich and pretty does not mean we have to like her. She is too proud and her children are spoiled rotten little babies” Sansa gasped horrified and at the verge of tears after the discussion with Arya and Nan awful, insensitive words.

Nan really understood her sister Sansa the least of all. She sighted even deeper and took her hand gently

“sorry sister I am being terribly rude, would you help me choose my gown for today? you have better sense than me” Sansa smiled at that, she loved dressing up.

They were interrupted though, by a crowd surrounding the new arriving Knights. Sansa was startled by the sight of an odd looking man and lost her footing but before Nan could do anything Sandor Clegane had her in his grasp

“you are Shaking girl do I frighten you so much” said his dark mocking voice.

“Pardon my sister Ser she just lost her footing” Said Nan with studied courtesy but Sansa had dropped to her knees to wrap her arms around Lady like a scared little kid, which she actually was. “Sister, what is wrong?”

But she did not answer and the sound of laughter from the crowd only made it worse, Sansa could not stand mockery and she was beginning to really shake. Attention was drawn to the wolfs and two impressive looking Knights, one young and handsome and the other old and noble looking, were approaching with hands in their swords. Nan took a step towards them.

“No need for swords Sers, the wolves belong to us and they are harmless”

Lady was growling softly enough in Sansa’s arms and Whisper was alert at her side but calm. Still, they looked doubtfully at her while she tried to stand calm and with all the authority a child could possibly have. Trying for her best impression at her mother.

“Joeffrey go to her” The voice of the Queen herself spoke parting the crowd.

And of course in the presence of her prince all of Sansa woes and sorrows vanished. As soon as she was able to speak she was choosing all the right words to dissipate the tension. The old knight in white was gentle and praised her and all was good until they separated, Sansa was going to ride with the prince. _Of course she loves riding now._

Nan didn’t know what was happening She only heard Arya was missing and Sansa wouldn’t talk to her, and the queen was ordering their werewolfs to die.

She went in search of Arya the second day, her Father would be mad but she let Jory know in a note and took Whisper with her, the wolf found her sister soon enough, she hug her and listened to her, gave her an apple and bred and they both kept going a bit farther.

Arya wasn’t lying but they may not care for the words of a child. Jory had warned her, the queen wanted all of their wolves. And they were in the woods, they knew how to hunt. She cry with Arya all night and finally they made their way back without their direwolves. It felt wrong.

Her Father was horribly worried or so she assumed since he wasn't there. The king and queen were there and Joffrey too and ser Barristan and Renly.

“Child what happened” Asked the king before her father even arrived

“I was not there your grace, but I do know the direwolves don’t attack without reason” A derisive sound from somewhere in the room was her only answer

Then Arya told her story, Joffrey told a bunch of lies after and when Sansa said she did not remember Nadja wanted to slap her, but she contented herself with a murderous glance as Arya hit her.

The King seemed to want to end the ugly business but the queen did not. She wanted the wolves dead. Just as Jory warned her. The only one left was Lady.

“Your grace what good could possibly come out of this, punishing a girl that did nothing wrong over words that cannot be proven?” she pleaded only looking at the king “What will you gain but the sadness of children? my sisters will not learn from this kind of punishment. And neither will your son”

“How dare you lecture your king you insolent little”

“Damn you Cersei quiet already” Interrupted the king but he still did not listen. Direwolves were not pets apparently.

___________

Ned did it. When it was done Nan sat beside him her eyes were misty and her lips trembling while she tried not to cry reaching for him, he embraced her daughter and asked Jory to take Lady to winterfell

“we should've stayed home” she whispered in his arms like a bad omen.

Nan didn’t talk to Sansa at all for days on end, Sansa wouldn’t talk to them either “It was your fault that Lady died. Your fault that Arya and I had to lost our wolves. Stop blaming Father. How stupid can you get?” She said one day at the table and he was almost glad for her previous silence.

“We have to take care of each other Nan, forget you anger. When the snow falls and the white winds blow, the lone wolf dies but the pack survives” He told her after that, the old saying of the north.

The arrive to King’s Landing wasn’t any better, people stopped being exciting and Nan was getting nightmares, she saw shadows everywhere. Sansa and Arya were better now, but Nadja only seemed to get more and more restless

“Dad, I want to go back home” _me too kid_ , he thought.

“Nan... It will take us all some time to adjust” he said instead “Please make an effort, Sansa seems happy with her engagement”

“The prince is horrible, everyone here is horrible”

Many months later in a dark cell drowning in regrets, not listening to his daughter plead was one of the biggest ones. But truly the worst one came later, when he was in front of a blood thirsty crowd and at the mercy of an even more violent crowned kid. Leaving his children in the hands of so many horrible people was indeed his biggest regret.


	5. Staring back at bloody lines

For weeks it had been hard to get out of bed. Thankfully she didn’t need to do it often. After her father’s dead they have kept her in her chambers, separated from Sansa and with only the maids for company. Not a good company though, they didn’t talk much and the ones who did she didn’t trust. And she had being angry, too angry to talk.

But not at first. At first, when her father had being injured by Jaime Lannister it was only fear that she felt, fear for his father's injured leg and tears to mourn the others, to mourn Jory and the northerner guards that laid dead on the streets. Fear for her fathers worried face and the eyes that followed him when he passed. The court had eyes on them, ravenous eyes and smiles with too many teeth that made her shiver.

Her father had known it too, he’d tried to take them to safety. What had happened. Why did the plan wouldn’t work. She didn't know. she didn’t know the how or why but the when seemed clear. It all had gone to seven frozen hells with Robert Baratheon’s death. And she was a prisoner now.

At least Arya had escaped. But she feared for her too, how would she escape the city by herself, how would she survive? thinking about Arya made her feel helpless and anxious thinking that maybe she was in more danger now than she would have been as a prisoner, but there was nothing she could do about it. Not now. She had done for her the only thing she could.

When they went after them she had run to her sister and dragged her away from Syrio Forel, bless the man. He had tried to save them too. They’d runned to the stables, and when the stable boy showed up and her little sister put her sword in front of her, shocked and frightened at the blood, Nadja had put and arrow through his eye. She took her by the shoulders and shook her “it wasn’t you, I killed him, it wasn’t you. Now run Arya” she said while she looked her in the eyes and stuffed jewelry on her pants, she could hear guards approaching. “Arya you have to run, run now” and she did. Dressed in her dirty pants and brown shirt she may have a chance not catching anyones eye. Especially after she took a horse and made a run for the doors. All the guards were on her in a second, she struggled, bite and screamed. And hoped no one would notice the scrawny little girl running for her life.  

When Cersei Lannister herself went to see her on her chambers a few days later she pointedly asked where her sisters where. She knew Arya had escaped, the maidens whispered when they tough she was sleeping. One of the Stark sisters was missing. But Cersei didn’t tell her anything. She asked her to write a letter, then she could know about her sisters. She didn’t write the letter. “My father is not a traitor” was the only other thing she said in her presence.

 After that they have kept her in her chamber until the day they cut her father's head. And then she wasn't afraid anymore. She was angry, so angry she screamed and trashed her chambers. But after days on end of nothingness her anger was mostly gone. What was happening outside? where was Sansa? were they going to be traded? she was going mad and dread settled on her stomach like a stone. She needed to know.   

Her nightmares stopped, replaced by sleepless nights. She would read if she could but mostly she just stared out of her window wondering. The stars at least… the stars at least were the same. She needed to know.     

The Red Keep warded its secrets fiercely. That first day, way before her father's death, when she and Arya found the tunnel that lead outside they hadn’t had the time to realise what it was. But a prisoner had nothing but time. Not by day, no… by day she slept and drink and eat whatever she could stomach.

At night, when she was sure no one would look for her she started searching. She wanted to get out badly. It took her five nights of careful looking and she gave hope at the third one, but really she had nothing better to do so she look and looked again. Every cranny, rock, every bit of the walls and floor quiet and slow. Until finally, near dawn, the wall at the back of her fireplace moved. She smiled for the first time since her Father's injury. After that she walked every night the walls of the Red keep.

It was so intricate it seemed impossible. She didn’t know where she was most of the time, and the opening of every door was terrifying, always in fear that it would lead to someone’s chamber and she’ll be caught. But Nadja kept at it, she drew a map in the border of different pages, just lines so it would not look like a map unless you put the pages just at the right angle, and scribbled poetry on them for good measure.

Every night she advanced a bit more. She counted in her head, for not to lose track of time in the darkness. She found her way to the kitchens and to the tower of the hand, she found her way to one of the yards, but mostly there were just simple rooms. People she didn’t knew, servants and some nobles she didn’t care about. After a month of looking she still couldn’t find Sansa’s room or the small chamber or any way out of the Keep no the one she had found with Arya and no any other. She wanted to cry after every night lost in those dark tunnels. It was getting harder to do anything but sleep by day and walk at night.

Nadja often lurked at night near the kitchens. Between the walls of the red keep she could hear the servants talk freely among themselves and the amount of gossip on all the inhabitants of King’s Landing was as impressive as confusing, what to believe. After a few nights she heard the same rumor on and on, Stannis Baratheon claimed Jeffrey was a bastard product of incest. Something like that was sure to be repeated. A low blow from Stannis in this dirty war of too many kings. But Nan could not get it out of her head. It would explain so many things.

When they finally left her out of her room and she could see Sansa. It was like seeing sunlight after a long deprivation, after a month of nothing but walking in those dark walls hope more and more thin every night. Her sister was unharmed and happy to see her, they let them wander the castle now, there was always someone watching them but they could walk the gardens and eat together. The downside was Joffrey.

 

Joffrey beats Sansa the most, he enjoys her tears and screams and begging. Nadja didn’t cry or scream, she tries not to make a sound. She tries to stand straight and stare down at him even when he is taller, tries to make him feel small and insignificant. Like the craven he was. But sometimes they would beat her legs and her legs would give up. And sometimes they would beat at her stomach and she would gasp for breath.

Everyone averted her gaze, all the nobles that once were so eager to compliment her dress and her hair now look the other way when she walks by, now they laugh at every cruel and witless thing Joffrey say. Or now they think they have the right to mock her too. They do not. So when Lancel Lannister makes what he believes is a funny remark on her behalf she looks at him and smile, she smiles sweetly and then trips him on the floor. She does it quickly and walks away quickly, because he is a Lannister and if it hadn't been the hound who was watching her, instead of a laughter she would have received a beating.    

But her father was no liar, she was not weak, she would not cry in front of them. That’s why Joffrey beats Sansa the most. Because he could hurt her the most and she’d shown it. She was weak. But in this Red Hell of stone she was her only family. And whenever they were together, whenever she could Nan would take the beating. If Joffrey was in the mood for it she would make fun of him and take it before his eyes strayed to Sansa. It was just slightly effective. 

She lost weight, she lost color and Sansa was no better. Sansa still smiled prettily, she was good at playing the part, Nan had no interest in those false smiles she rather have the beatings. She didn’t smiled at Sansa either. She had told her about the letter. Tears running down her cheeks while she told her how the queen had been so good to her and how she had promised they would all be alright… she just needed to betray her father.

 

“If our brother ever declare our own father a traitor I’ll jump from my window. Good thing he is not stupid.”

 

She only ever smiled at Tommen and Myrcella, sad tiny smiles but they were the only people in all the Red King that she could look at without wanting to hurt them bad.

Them and Clegane, she did not like the Hound precisely but at least he was no liar, and surprisingly the hideous man had proven himself to be the only one with a shred of decency. Joffrey did not ask him to beat them and Nan noticed that he would often, offhandedly diverge Joffrey’s attention from her and Sansa. 

 

 

Tyrion arrived at the Red Keep the day of the tournament in honor of Joffrey’s name day with a horde of savages and a sellsword that moved like a cat. He greeted his niece and nephew and then Joffrey before turning to Nadja and Sansa.

 

“My ladies I’m sorry for your loses, truly the gods are cruel.” Joffrey and the children were distracted and then went away after a few moments, already tired of the sad attempt of a tournament. And then they were alone with him.

“Are you?” she said ice in her voice. And a little surprised at herself for the unnecessary outburst.

“I am” he answered softly but she would not meet his eyes “Is it grief for your father what have you both so sad?”

“Our father was a traitor I am loyal to my beloved Joffrey” answered Sansa like a reflex

“As loyal as a deer surrounded by wolves”

“lions” whispered Sansa scaring herself. Nan stood up.

“That our Father died under such circumstances pains us greatly my Lord” said Nan in the same emotionless tone of voice. An answer that could be openly interpreted  “Forgive my sister, such savagery happening in the realm make her scared.”

“I am only a little lion child and I vow I shall not savage you” they did not believe him. Nan started to make her way with a cursory glance at the sellsword.

 

Tyrion did not missed a detail. Not the way she hadn’t been looking at her sister even when helping her out and had spared for her not a glance, nor the way Sansa kept her distance from her, no one else would have notice that thought. No one who had not seen them before, the Starks progenee walked close to each other keeping each others warm and safe in their winter lands.

But not now in their times of grief. He had his answer from Cersei when she told him Sansa was the one to tell her about Lord Starks plans and therefore causing his imprisonment and demise. No wonder they were not that close anymore. Poor kids, fortunately the Starks were not his problem. Nadja wasn’t going to warm up to him again. Not after his family had killed her father. And that was for the better he had many other matters to attend. The Stark girls were someone else problem. Or so he thought.

Tyrion went down from breaking the fast with maester Pycelle after giving him the task to send a confidential letter. _Lets see how long remains confidential_. and saw Bron reclined on a well and near him Nadja Stark. He approached and attempted a joyful greeting

 

“My Lady Nadja good morning”

“Morning My Lord” she said blandly

“May I introduce you to Bron the chief of my personal guard” She looked at him much longer than the glance she half directed to Tyrion and  bowed her head in greeting “May I ask what are you doing Nadja?” she grimace at the familiarity but finally looked at him, a calculating gaze.

“There is very little I’m allowed. Holding a sword is certainly not one of those.”

“So you look at them instead?” said Bronn and her eyes darted to his.

“As you do” she said and after a nod and a _with your leave_ quickly departed. A Kingsguard behind her with a scowl. Tyrion made a pensive sound  

“why do you watch them Bronn?” The sellsword took his sweet time to respond.

“The boy with the three eyes on his shield. He is the best of them, but he falls into a rhythm. That will be the dead of him the day he face me.”

“Interesting… Bronn keep an eye on her whenever you can”

“She seems pretty well guarded”

“I know, you don’t have to follow her around but if she happened to be in danger and you happened to pass by, you are to protect her”

“Sounds troublesome. That one of the Starks girls isn’t she?”

“Hard not to notice the northerners this days. You just need to look for the most pale and miserable ones ”

 

She truly looked miserable, Nadja was there again when he held court for the first time, indifferent to everyone around her she stood out like a sore thumb in the crowd, too pale, too short, too solemn, too cold for Kings Landing. Even too proud among so many nobles. He called ser Cleos and Nan’s eyes were sharp in attention, when he announced that the Stark sisters were not going be given away he looked at her and she returned his gaze. Cold as the wall. and he felt a stab of pity for the sisters, and unwarranted guilt. It really wasn’t his fault what could he do? He still tried not to look at her when Ser Alliser Thorne came to speak of his frozen dead hand. She was still paying attention.

He just needed to stop looking. Nadja hated him now anyways so no good could come from worry about the kid. She seemed well enough, a bit too sickly but it may be the weather... the weather and her grief and her lack of friends and allies and gods knew what else.  _stop looking_ he had enough to worry about with Shae and the realm and his sister. Especially his sister.

 

 

Nadja dreams of trees. Not her tall trees of winterfell, not the frozen morning dew that shined like diamonds, but the woods of the south warm and full of prey. She dreams of running fast and strong. That was most nights, some nights she dreamed she was flying, and others she was roaming the walls of the Red Keep silent and agile and almost invisible. There were nights she would wake up screaming.

         

It was one of those rare occasions when Joffrey summoned both. Sandor Clegane had come for her and Sansa.

“what is this about?” she asked, she only ever talked willingly to Clegane.

“your kingly brother”

“Robb is a traitor, we had no part in what he did” said Sansa and Nadja frowned, she also ever frowned in front of Clegane walking them, he was not brutal like the others, only worse mannered. She didn’t have a reason anyways, being mad at Sansa was childish and bad for the both of them, Sansa too was trying to survive in the only way she could. And she should keep doing it. It was just the letter she could not forget about. But she needed to.

The Hound snorted his response  

“they trained you well little bird. you not so much wolf girl. It's going to get you killed”

“I was perfectly educated, thank you” he snorted again. A little reprieve before what was coming.

The imbecil was condemning them both for Robbs last win in the field. She was happy about it, proud, a small amount of joy in the hall full of enemies and pitying looks. Robb was fighting back, and winning. The king in the north was fighting and she was not bound in any way to this one or any of the inhabitants of the Red Keep. She had another king. Joffrey could make his knights beat her if he wanted.

When the fool, _Ser Dontos was it?_ came at them with his rotten melon she did nothing to stop him but send him a glare at the first blow, he target Sansa instead covering her in sticky fruit in front of the court. Everybody laughed except for Joffrey. When Boros and Meryn advanced she smiled sharp and raised her voice in a mocking tone.

 

“why you highness¡ is it so little trouble to defeat your actual enemies that you and your valiant Knight’s  have the time for us? I am impressed, war affairs must be such a trifle for you.”

 

That did it. One of them hold her still while the other punched her in the gut, no mercy shown in the blow. She gasped for air and made pitiful sounds at every blown, but she did not yell, Sansa did that for her. At first she refused to yell but at the end she simply couldn’t. Could barely stand on her own, even less when they started hitting her with the flat of the blade across her tights.

 

“enough” she heard the rasp sound of the hound. _fool_

“no it isn’t” said the hateful voice of Joffrey.

 

When Boros stripped her dress she made an attempt, even though she felt her legs might break, and stood as tall and still as she could. Her beating from last time was there for everyone to see. _Let them see_. Their stares could not touch her, just like the beatings and the snickering. It all could be ignored, she just needed to want it enough to disappear completely. But Sasa was crying and screaming.

“please please your highness please” _don’t beg sansa, not for me, wolfs don’t beg Sansa_ But Sansa had always being scared of multitudes, she feared the public scorn, she felt shame she felt mocked… her foolish little sister.

“Let her alone” she said without breath when Meryn approached her sister, and he laughed on her face.

“Put a hand on my sister and I’ll cut it” He laughed again and when he reached to reap Sansa’s dress Nadja reached for his sword and cut his wrist.

It wasn’t a clean cut, the chainmail didn’t allow her scrawny arms to do that but it was deep enough to make him back off wailing. She kept the sword ready, _stupid, stupid, stupid_ , she knew she should let go of the sword but she was so angry… and Joffrey was _so close_ ... _let go let go_ Boros was approaching her furiously. _what happens if I kill him?_

 

“what's the meaning of this” A familiar voice said and there it was Tyrion Lannister, his voice like a whip. “What sort of knight beats helpless maids”

“the sort that serves his king Imp” the sellsword, Bronn, was by her side in a second putting his red cape around her and taking the sword _Lannister red_ She though but covered herself and willingly let go. Meryn Trant was joining Boros in his fighting stand. Swordless.

“Careful with those, you don’t want to get more blood on those pretty white clothes” Mock them the sellsword.

“someone give the girl something to cover herself with” The imp said in the same angry voice and the hound put his cape around Sansa

“have you not regard for their honour?” he demands to his nephew

“Im punishing them! they have the wolf blood, traitor's blood” answers Joffrey spitting furiously now that someone interrupted his fun.

“And you have the wits of a goose”

“You can’t talk to me like that. I’m the king! a king can do what he wants”

“Aeris did what he wanted do you know what happened to him?”

“Are you threatening your king imp?” said Boros red

“I'm not threatening the king I’m educating my nephew. Bronn Timett if Ser Boros open his mouth again kill him. See the difference? Brutality will not win you the love of your people or your queen”

“I don’t need their love is better that they fear us, mothers said so. She fears me” he yells pointing at Sansa, shaking and sobbing.

“It's a shame Stannis and Renly are not twelve years old girls. Bronn, Timett bring the girls”

 

Nan didn’t need more prompting than that. She walked away with Tyrion, her legs hurting and shaking but she followed him. She followed him because there was no one else that would said a word on her behalf no one that would spare her anything but a pitiful glance. It felt uncomfortably like surrender. 

 


	6. Reluctant Heores

They took the Stark sisters to the tower of the hand and she left herself be bathed and tended by the maids, Sansa was there too but she did not want to look at her, she could hear her soft sobbing fading and she knew she should go to her, try to comfort her, but she was too sore and so tired. And what was this now? Tyrion Lannister had been nothing but kind and it leave her feeling uneasy, a fear that not the queen and not Joffrey had managed.

 

Maester Frenken tended to her wounds and give her dreamwine. When she woke up Sansa was not there and it was dark. A serving girl brought her food that she did not touch.

 

She felt clearer now after resting, Tyrion was playing too. There was no love lost between him and his nephew or hir sister as far as she could tell and the Stark girls on his hands were probably some sort of power move. It was all right, he didn’t give the impression of being the type to physically mistreat them and Joffrey would probably have less access to them both.

 

On the other hand, whatever endgame he or the queen were aiming for it could only end bad for Robb, and the queen could be ruthless yes, but Tyrion was clever. In the long game it was probably better for the queen to make the decisions and for Tyrion to sit back. But she had to left Robb’s problems to Robb. She wanted to survive too. If Tyrion was going to use them in some way it would at least spare her and Sansa some beatings. Hopefully.

 

Tyrion knocked at the door before entering. The look she gave him was Ice cold, Steel hard. Her expression completely blank. Nadja had the Stark face, he thought, long, solemn and guarded but once she had smiled and it had been clear and true like a welcoming morning. Not now.

 

“My Lady I hope I'm not disturbing you”

“Where is Sansa?”

“In the chambers across the hall, you might see her whenever you want” she still revealed nothing in her face but nodded

“Are we your prisoners now My lord Hand?”

“My guests” she quirked an eyebrow at him

“How do you call an unwilling guest?”

“A well treated prisoner” he attempted, she was right after all “I tough we might talk”

“As my lord commands” she said. was it mocking or simply tired?  

“Are the food and garments to your satisfaction? if there’s anything else you want you need only ask”

She remained silent for too long but finally spoke just when he was about to

“Joffrey was not very specific as to what was the reason of his royal displeasure” she said offhandlely like she really didn’t care that much. Sansa entered the room and crossed the room to hug her sister, an inkling of a smile touched Nadja’s face. “are you alright Sansa?” she asked softly

“they hurt you so much Nan” she said almost sobbing again

“I'm fine the maester said so. Now sit sister, the Lord Hand wants to talk with us”

“Indeed, and as for your question your brother Robb won a crushing victory against my uncle Stafford not three days ride of casterly rock six nights ago.”  Nan made a thoughtful hum like taste testing a bite of something.

“that’s terrible my lord” said Sansa nervously looking at her sister and trying hard not to stare at him “our brother is a vile traitor” Tyrion smiled and talked with detail about the battle, Nan listened eagerly. Almost like before when he answered her infinite questions.

“Well Robb’s my fathers bane Joffrey is mine. Do you still want to be wed to him?”

“I love him with all my heart”

“Truly?” said Tyrion with an sceptical smile

“Our feelings for Joffrey are stronger than ever I assure you” Said Nan and Tyrion laugh heartily at that.

“well children if is any solace I don’t intent to marry you to Joffrey.” He said and he wasn’t sure why did he expected an answer “You grown quiet is that what you want child?” he tried talking to Sansa

“I.. Only want to be loyal” she said in a scared little voice, Nadja was staring at him suspiciously

“Loyal and far from any Lannister. Can scarcely blame you I wanted the same at your age. You both can stay here I’ll put some of my personal guard at your door”

“no” said Sansa “please no my lord the wildlings frighten me”  

“me too but more importantly they scare Joffrey”

“I couldn't sleep here my lord, My father’s men died in this tower I would see them everywhere. I rather go back to my rooms”

“I see, I’m no stranger to nightmares” Sansa sighted relief and Nan was looking at her with rapt attention, like she wanted to see the nightmares inside her head “Nadja I would recommend you stayed at least until you are completely healed, the maester did not seemed happy about your general health…”  she nodded “Very well then I’ll let you get some rest, Chella will scort your sister safely to her chambers”

 

Nan passed the day searching the new chambers. One she hasn’t been at through the walls but the tower of the hand had many exits and she hadn’t have time to explore them all. One as big as this probably had a secret door.She found nothing the first day but she only searched half the room. Maybe tomorrow. She was in pain from the beating and crawling through the floors wasn’t making her better. Nadja eat a few bites and went to sleep.

 

She was as light as a feather, her steps made no sound on the tall border of the stone wall. She was invisible, the tall shadows in the garden beneath could not see her. She just needed to be quiet. There was a familiar smell inside, near the light where the light could make her visible, but only if she wasn’t quiet enough. And she was silence. She jumped to the tree branch and not a leaf moved. Walked closer to the window, the smell made her curious. A smell that should not be here, not know. But it was familiar, just a bit, like something she had once passed by and could not place.

 

“I heard a lovely story about the gallant rescue of the Stark girls”

“Easy to appear gallant went all the rest have the honor of a thief. You should have done something about that, the poor girls were going to end dead or crippled in one of Joffrey's fits”

“It would have been a tragedy my lord, but what can a poor spider do about the will of the king. The queen was already aware”

“That was too much even for Cersei’s standards. Not to mention foolish we need the Stark girls. Their dead will only make our relationship with the northerners worst”

“Indeed. But dare I say, I don’t believe the queen thought her dear son capable of going that far”

“Or she didn’t care. But she does love her little monster.”

“either way I can only hope things will be better now that you are here my lord hand”

“better for whom?”

“the kingdom of course”

 

___________  

 

Tyrion found her quiet and apparently relaxed, still cold towards him. But oddly polite to his clansmen, she seemed much more comfortable with them than apparently with any other inhabitant of the Red Keep. He supposed it made sense,the clansman where as different from the people that hurt her and her sister as they could get.

  


“My lady are you better this morning?”

“I am”

“good. remember you need only ask”

“Can I ask who?”

“who?”

“who if not joffrey are you planning on marrying Sansa to?”

“when the war is over I plan to return both of you to your home”

“when the king in the north bend the knee you mean?”

“Yes my lady, the next time you go to the godswood you may want to pray for your brother to bend the knee” he said trying to be gentle but there was no masking the truth “may his last win not misguide you, a battle is not a war”

“I know that. You must also know. I could pray my whole life and my brother would not bend the knee nor he will exchange us for your brother. He is young not stupid”

“Do you resent him for that?” She looked at him with a confused stare

“I’m proud of him for that” _this is the fearlessness that allow her to draw a sword in that hall. It will only make things more difficult to you child…_

“Even if he were to surrender, my return home would not be unmarried would it?”  She asked after a minute of silence

“Probably not, you are of age I think? you sister could easily return for your family to found her a suitable marriage since the braking of a betrothal would be.. inconvenient for a while. But you are not betrothed, eligible and the eldest daughter. You would be returned with a possible suitor. Amending the relationship between the north and the crown will be of importance. Your marriage will suit those purposes. But I am sure your family would have a say in those” She sighed heavily.

“You are surprisingly optimistic my Lord. Can I ask why did my mother took you prisoner? Father never told me”

“Well… Lady Stark was under the impression that I had something to do with… Have someone told you? your mother claims someone attempted to murder you brother while he was still bedridden. He is safe though your mother manage to protect him and his wolf apparently eat the attacker. Or mauled him whichever version you prefer.”

“No one told me”

“Well your mother was under the impression I had something to do with that”

“did you?” she asked

“No, of course no. I have never wished your brother Bran any harm”

“Why did she tough so?”

“I am not sure Nadja” he said “but you should know by now, how the word twist on places like this. Beware what you hear and who you believe”

 

He left her wondering if she believed him. She was not a trusting child anymore but she was still a child. He went to Varys. They had planned to put Shae on Nadja’s service so she could be on the castle as she wanted. Tyrion didn’t like the plan but Shae would not stop talking about it. She couldn’t know how danger was on every corner of this place, how cruel his father could be and how unsparing Cersei. He needed to keep her a secret. Nadja was a sweet child maybe she would even like her.

Tyrion was quite disappointed about that optimistic assumption. Shae hated being Nadja’s maid. But it wasn’t about Nadja as much as it was about the work itself.

 

“She’s frigid that one. The others maids said she never talks even when they try to be nice. Only because she is highborne, like her house hasn’t fallen already. She is just a prisoner now.”

“She is just a kid, and is going through very difficult times”

“She is not. She bleeds already she can be married. But it could be worse I guess. She doesn’t make a lot of work. likes to be alone so we are dismissed most of the day.”

“see? you’ll get use to this very soon”

 

Hopefully it was truth. He could keep an eye on the girl through Shae without having to do much. As long as Varys kept quiet there was no reason for Cersei to find out. The Stark girls would be safe under his care, Shae would remain hidden and he could invest himself on rescuing Jaime. He already was planning on it. Cersei didn’t trusted him of course but at least on this they could agree to work together. A prisoner exchange was out of the question, two little girls had no value on this war and the Stark boy knew it. Nadja was right he would not yield. Not after cutting Ned Stark head. He had told the same to his father. And the easy way he agreed left him a little unsettled.

 

But that was not his problem. His immediate concern was a very satisfying visit to Pycells chambers. The old fool was Cersei spy. He had told how he was planning on marrying Myrcella to Dorne. Which was a much better option than most of them had with Stannis treat approaching the city. The small folk was already upset for the food shortage and the increasing prices. He could not see the solution to that. He was planning on how to protect them and keep them from starving.   

 

Returning to the Red Keep from Myrcella’s departure Sansa was riding with Joffrey as befitted his betrothed even when the proposal for the king to marry the Tyrell girl was already sent. Nadja was riding not beside him but carefully near Bronn in a black palfrey  Tyrion had noticed she much prefer the company of his personal guard. And also, everybody could felt the mood of the crowd. A cheer here and there but their faces showed no joy in the presence of the royal house. Nadja willed her mount near Sansa and Clegane. And there she was when it all went wrong.

 

“Who threw that? Dog bring me his head! “ yelled Joffrey and the crowd seemed so close now

“Stay he must be long gone” Nadja said with a hand on the Hound’s arm. She could see the disaster too. But Clegane dismounted and Joffrey kept Yelling  

“Clegane leave off” tried Tyrion

“I want him¡ Dog cut through them” And the angry roar drowned his words.

“To the castle now. _Ride_ ” ordered Tyrion and for a few anguished minutes he saw things in a blur, chopped hands, some of his companions being pulled down of his horses, Clegane's horse beside him galloping riderless.

 

Once safe behind the walls of the Keep he could listen to his nephew no more

“you blind bloody fool “ he yelled at him and slapped him “you just killed Clegane and gods know how many more and yet you are unscathered! damn you!” he kicked him on the grown once before Bronn was stopping him and the other knights appeared beside the king

“how many are still out there” they started to name people and then he realised “where is Nadja? where are the Stark girls?” he yelled

“Sansa was riding by me but then she wasn't there, Nadja went back for her” said Joffrey reluctant. He was about to yell some more but Cercei spoke first

“Boros, Meryn go back and find the girls” she knew as well as him that if anything happened to the Starks Jaime was as good as dead.

“Your Grace the sight of our white cloaks may enrage the mob”

“The Others take you fucking cloaks¡ take them off if you are afraid but _find me the Stark girls_ or I swear I’ll have Shagga split that ugly head of yours” He said

“you dare call me ugly”

“stop it, you will do as ordered or we’ll find someone else to wear that cloak” said his queenly sister

“there they are¡” Yelled Joffrey

 

And there it was Sandor Clegane astride Nadja’s black horse Sansa Stark was mounting behind him a gash on her scalp. Nadja in the front of the palfrey was holding onto Clegane as hard as she could. She looked incredibly small against Clegane. Her head against his chest. Tyrion could not see if she was unharmed but on her hands, where her knuckles were white from the force of her grip, was blood.

“My ladies are you alright?” Sandor dismounted easily with Nadja still holding onto him and put her on the floor. She had blood in her face, hands, and the front of her gown.

“I believe none of that is hers” he said while lifting Sansa of the horse “she bite off the ear of the poor sod that had her cornered” he said with a raspy laugh “but the little bird is bleeding someone take them to the maester to see to their wounds” The maester hurried up to the girls first to Nadja the most alarming looking but she slapped his hand away

“I'm fine” she said her voice steady and cold “see to Sansa” Frenken obeyed and see to Sansa who was babbling a bit in shock while the Hound kept giving the account of those he saw dead

“Where’s my horse. If anything happen to him someone's going to pay” he yelled

“he was riding with us for a while but I did not see what happened to him afterwards” answered Tyrion Still looking at Nadja "Did you just said she bite someones ear off?" 

"She was working on a throat when I arrived" He answered amused.


End file.
